sociallychallenged | (no subject)

[In this case, he didn't sputter because it was funny, but because he realized he'd have to explain in front of God and Pichu himself a sex-related metaphor.]

Always happy to meet a basic standard.

[That one he actually smiles at a little.]

[....There are Pokemon child seats. That is the cutest fucking thing? What the hell is this place.] Now that I've gotten this meal off to a great start I'm going to order when the waitress comes by. You want me to get you anything off the menu or are you just going to go with the buffet?

I’d like to try the pizza. Which drink should I order?

[There are so many, and Hank said not to mix them too much.]

Preferably something that still tastes nice.

Edited 2018-09-17 02:02 (UTC)

Look at the ingredients. Things with rum are probably going to be a little heavier. Things with vodka are going to be a little bitter. Wine's gonna taste like fermented grapes so... You'll have to be slow on the approach for that one. Liqueur is usually pretty sweet. Beers and ales can be hit or miss.

[Hank's commenting as he takes one last look at the menu, before handing it off to the waitress when she comes by and telling what they want for food. He just orders wine for himself because he knows they probably won't have anything harder. With two glasses, in case Connor wants to try it.]

I was warned they'll try to drink your booze so keep it away from the doe-eyed child.

Liqueur is sweet?

[He could try that, then.]

I’ll keep Buntz away from it.

[The Pichu looks up at them with innocent eyes.]

We don’t need a drunk Pichu.

[“Chu?” is the only response to that, and it’s so cute Connor can’t help picking him up and hugging him.]

Thank you for taking me out tonight, too.

[He watches Connor hug it and wonders, silently, if it knows it's cute and is using it for evil. Or if it's genuinely cute and going to be accidentally evil. Either way he can see no actual good coming from this creature.]

It's alright. Honestly, I was hoping that we could go on a real one.

[He gives Connor a little bit of a lopsided grin. It kind of killed him when he realized that he cared, and the best day he'd had in a while was meant to eventually be for someone else's benefit. It's nice to be on the receiving end of real affection.]

[Connor seems pleased with that response, gently putting Buntz back down and idly fixing his shirt.]

I’m glad you liked your Flabebe. She’s sweet, I played with her for a little while.

Making sure she wasn't a brat, huh? [He jokes. It's really a joke, because he's sure Connor would still give him a brat fairy.] To be honest I would have been okay with just a flower I could press. But you really went out of your way for a small thing.

[And Hank actually looks about as bashful as a big inept guy can at that (which is its own brand of bashful), playing with his silverware and them nearly dropping it and having to scramble to catch it.]

Honestly I'm really not the type of guy people have ever gone out of their way for. Romantically, anyway.

[Connor is charmed by the clumsy display, smiling and fiddling with his napkin.]

Of course I went out of my way. It was for you.

[The most important person in Connor’s world.]

I know you would do the same for me.

I'd probably have just gone and gotten you normal flowers again.

[He gives him a sort of dopey, half grin at that, still, though. He'd try at least. He certainly wishes somehow that he'd been able to introduce Connor to more of the world, but he really wants to believe that no matter what he'd still be important to him.]

[That sort of insecurity that comes from a man that had an ex that cared about him one day, and refused to talk to him even about what to do with their son's toys later.]

[He tries to not let that win. Especially when Connor seems genuinely pretty happy.] ...So if your Pichu steals my wine should I stop it or let it get drunk? [He says on a different, slightly sillier topic.]

He wouldn’t steal it. Probably.

[He casts a suspicious look at the Pichu.]

But I’m not sure it would be a good idea to let him get drunk.

[Still, he gets that it wasn’t a serious question, and his smile widens slightly at the mental image.]

[The waitress brings by some dinner rolls with their drinks, and Hank takes half of one and gives to the Pichu.] There, you'll need something on your stomach if you want to get shitfaced.

[He's already losing his dignity in that he just said 'shitfaced' to a cute little rodent. And here's Hank with his whole bottle of wine, which he pours a little out for Connor to try.]

Here you go. Honestly, it's kinda fun watching you figure out what you do or don't like. Been a while since I've felt that sort of adventurous.

[Pichu responds with a happy “chu!” at the comment, taking the bread and nibbling it. Connor takes his glass and tries some of the wine, and makes a bit of a face at it.]

I’m not sure I like that one.

[Still, he tries another sip. Not as bad as the first time, but he still isn’t a fan.]

Hopefully the liqueur will taste better.

[Of which he’s settled on something like Bailey’s.]

Why don’t you try something new tonight, too?

[Hank pours himself a full glass. He could genuinely just drink it from the bottle, but he's attempting some decorum here. Not much, but a little.]

I've tried most of the stuff on the menu.

[But then he glances up at Connor.] I'll figure out something later. [And then it takes a drink. 'New' doesn't have to involve food, right?]

Fucking... human bodies being so prone to aches and pains doesn't help.

[Connor wonders what trying new foods has to do with aches and pains. He waits for his drink and seems much more content with it.

Later, he’s tried lots of good food, and is fairly drunk because although he didn’t mix his drinks, he really likes Bailey’s apparently. He’s definitely more drunk this time than he was before, and he’s hanging off Hank’s arm as they walk back with a smile. Pichu is back in his ball, because as the night progressed he realised he was going to be too drunk to take care of a tiny thing. Crockett stays out, because all Crockett has to do is float by Connor’s head.]

I really like you, Hank.

[He is very adamant about this. He’s said it several times now.]

[Hank went through the bulk of the bottle of wine, and is therefore decently drunk. Not pass out in the floor drunk, but definitely 'laugh too loud' drunk and 'straight lines are a little difficult' drunk.]

[But he's navigating Connor back to their hotel, grateful that his Pichu is no longer out to witness this.]

I like you too, Connor. A lot better than I've liked most people. [That is said with overflowing affection.] I'm really lucky that I met you. I'm luckier that... other stuff happened. But I'm just lucky I met you. I needed that.

[Boy he hopes Connor's going to be okay, though, as he is way beyond pleasantly tipsy and willing to provoke him.]

[He hugs Hank’s arm to him, happy and drunk. He didn’t set out to get this drunk but it’s hard to judge just how bad it is when you’re sitting down.]

I’m glad I met you, too. And I’m glad that we’re here together.

[As nice as this place is, it wouldn’t be the same without his partner. When they get inside the room he wraps his arms around Hank’s shoulders and kisses him. He’s been wanting to do it all night, but right now he’s so full of affection for the other man that he can barely hold himself back.]

I kn-

[He's starting to say, but then his mouth is occupied by a drunken sweet tasting kiss. And it's not bad, and he holds him all the way through it, but when he does break it it's followed with a curt-]

I'm glad we're here together, too. And we're putting some water in you. [If he can manage to put Connor down somewhere for any amount of time. He's suddenly clung to him like a loving monkey, which normally he would adore but he's going to end up falling and bringing the skinny man down with him.]

[He makes an unhappy noise and lets go of Hank finally, realising that he’s going to make him have that water whether he wants it or not so he might as well accept it now.]

Fine.

[He sits down heavily on the edge of the bed, then lays back and stares at the ceiling. It’s spinning slowly, but closing his eyes just makes him feel uncomfortable.]

[He'll have it if Hank can survive the long journey from glass to bathroom to bed. A dizzy, flopped down Connor gets a kiss on his forehead, prickly with beard, before he goes off on his epic journey.]

[Hank realizes he will need water too, but Connor goes first.]

Here. [He says when has it, settles to sit on the bed beside him.] I'm a pretty good prop if you want to sit up.

[He sits back up when Hank settles down beside him, and though he feels like he can at least manage to sit and drink on his own he leans against Hank anyway.]

Thank you.

[Connor takes the glass and drinks his water, then hands the glass back and goes back to lying on his back with his legs dangling off the bed.]

I think I drank too much.

[State of the art detective.]

I think you might have. [Hank agrees, hoping that he doesn't get sick. If he remains still enough, it might settle. So instead of making Connor move around a bunch more, he just puts the glass off to the side and lays beside of him.]

[He takes his hand, twining their fingers together, and stares up at the ceiling with him. It's only after a few moments of discomfort that he realizes his hair is still up, so he pulls the tie free.]

Just be still and just be dizzy. Let your stomach ease and don't move. Remember that you don't have to move.

[Connor sighs through his nose and stares dully up ahead, but he squeezes the hand in his as a sign that he heard him. After a while of lying there he finally turns his head towards Hank.]

I feel a little better.

[Still drunk, but the water and time spent lying down helped sober him up slightly. He sits up again slowly, glancing down at Hank before leaning over and kissing him.]

You’ve done this a lot.

Yeah, well... [Hank closes his eyes at the kiss, smiling slightly.] Ill-gotten gains I can finally put to good use.

[He opens his eyes again, looking up at Connor, before propping himself up to lay on his side. Some of his hair is all out of place now, too, so he'll have to deal with the after-effects of pulling it back later.]

It's okay. I think you probably just learned how much you can handle tonight. And I learned many times that you like me. [He leans their foreheads together, looking at him cross-eyed.]

[He reaches out to brush that hair back into place as best as he can, smiling as Hank leans their foreheads together.]

I didn’t feel so bad until I got out of my seat.

[And then he’d almost fallen over.]

I think I liked it better when I was more pleasantly drunk, but our date more than makes up for it.

At least you didn't kill your own good time.

[Hank runs his hand over Connor's hair, smiling at him fussing over him.] You know. You're the first person I've done a total 180 with, too. Where I went from hating you to loving you. Very first one.

I deserved to have you show me up. Glad you did it.

[He knows that Connor doesn't really like to be reminded of how Hank used to feel, or how he used to be treated. But he wants to let him know that's definitely in the past.]